Facebook III

Not that many this time.

21.1.2013
Anna: Main shaadi mein jayungi, lehenga pehen ke, chudi, bindi, earring pehen ke, stage pe jake dance karungi. Phir Santa Clause mujhe le ke chale jayenge.
Me: Kahan le jayenge Santa Claus?
Anna: Bombay.
Me: Bombay? Bombay mein kaun rehta hai?
Anna: Salman Khan.
Me: !!!
I really wonder what goes on in that little head.

16.11.2012
At exactly two and half years old, Anna gave her first ‘interview’ today. Welcome to the rat race Baby. I wish I could keep you safe and away from the madness of this world for some more time.
Questions asked included what’s your name, sing a rhyme, identify animals, shapes, colours. She aced it . I’m so proud that I don’t even care if she gets in or not. Their loss if she doesn’t.

25.10.2012
Conversations with a toddler
1)
Anna: Doggy blah blah blah. Doggy ki itniii lambi tail hoti hai.
Me: Tumhari tail hai?
Anna: Nahi. Mera to sirf bottom hai.
2)
The second blood-thirsty story.
Snake aise aise karke ja raha tha. Maine danda se usse maar diya. To woh ‘chee’ karke mar gaya. The end.
3)
Anna (to me – very sternly): Mujhe gussa mat ‘hilao’. Nahi to main gussa hoke tumhe bohot dantungi!

3.10.2012
Anna’s first story.
Catty so rahi thi. Eyes close kar ke so rahi thi. Maine usse jaga diya. To woh uth ke mujhe kha gayi.
THE END.

Nani

My grandmother, my Nani, my mother’s mother, my (I am not ashamed to say it) favourite grandparent, died on 19th March. It was sudden, she was fine till around 10 in the night, she went to bed and started vomitting and then lost consciousness. There were multiple haemorrhages in her brain and there was no hope. She remained on the ventilator for a day and then her heart just stopped beating. She was 79 years old. She had a good life and she had a good death. No lingering in the hospital, no long illness, she didn’t even make her children have to take the decision to remove her from the ventilator. She saw her 3 children and 6 grandchildren prosper. She played with 5 great grandchildren. She was looking forward to the marriage of her youngest grandchild in November. She was eager to meet 2 new great-grandchildren later this year. She died in the midst of family. She and my grandfather were at my Aunt’s house, spending time with my cousin (her eldest and in some ways favourite granddaughter) and her 4 month old twins.

I had sometimes imagined how I would feel when my Nani died – specially since my paternal grandfather died 2 years ago. I am somehow less devastated than I had imagined I would be (and yes the guilt is there for that). Maybe because it’s still not sunk in, maybe because my heart has still not fully grasped what it has lost.  Maybe because I also feel so incredibly blessed, blessed to have had her as my grandmother for 30 years, blessed to have been born in this family, blessed to have spent a lot of time with her both as a child and as an adult, blessed to have felt her love, blessed to know that Anna gave her a lot of joy, blessed to have been so very close to her, blessed to have learnt so many things from her, blessed to have her copy of ‘Far from the madding crowds’ and to know that I can pass it on to Anna, blessed to have her live in my heart and the hearts of all those who loved her.

We got the news on Monday morning that she was in hospital. My mother immediately left, she was staying at my brother’s place. My brother and cousins and I left the next day. Anna had fallen sick and I was not going to go – but R booked my tickets at the last minute. I love him so much for doing that – I would have never forgiven myself for not going. I did come back in only a day and didn’t reach in time for the funeral but I went and it means a lot to me.

I talked to her on Sunday. Mummy was staying with us for the day and her phone rang. She was having a bath and even though I was as usual rushing around, I picked up the phone. I talked to her. We had plans to meet later this year. She was going to come and stay with Mummy when I went there in September/October after having the baby (Yes, I’m pregnant, that was my big news which I had mentioned in the last post. The baby is due in August and I’ll be 20 weeks through tomorrow). Then we were all going to get together for my cousin’s wedding, the last on my mother’s side of the family.

The regret of not having spent more time with her, specially in the last few years, is always with me. I last met her when they had come to Bangalore in June 2011. We were going to meet in February last year but last minute work at R’s office made us cancel, I was going to go in August last year but again it didn’t materialize, I was going to go in February end/March beginning this year but we went to Goa instead thinking that in any case I will get to stay with them for a long time once I’m on maternity leave. When will we learn? When will we learn to understand what is important and what isn’t?

I still can’t imagine a world where she’s not there, not there to smile her dimpled smile, not there to cook fabulous stuff for us, not there to tell us stories, not there to lie in the dark and talk for hours, not there for us to scold when she ate too much sweet (she was diabetic), not there to call and say ‘Hello Nani’ on the phone ever again, not there to take care of my grandfather, not there at all. That I can never say ‘she is’ ever again.

My mother is devastated. And I am here, in office, ‘working’. Way to go.

I don’t want to end this post on a bitter note. So I will write some more about Nani. She was born on 18th October 1933/34. The date on her records in 1934, but she was an infant during a bad earthquake in Bihar which happened before October 1934, which indicates that it was most probably 1933. Her father was in the state government and they lived all over Bihar. She was a B.A from Women’s College in Patna. She got married to my grandfather on 3rd March 1952. She had 3 children, 2 girls and then a boy. She was very good at knitting, stitching and embroidery. Anna has a sweater made by her and we used to get new ones every year when we were kids. She was a very progressive lady and I really admire her ability to change with the times. She was lady in every sense of the word – poised, always well groomed and stylishly turned out, caring and kind, compassionate but also strict and firm when she needed to be. She was and will remain, loved by all those who knew her.

Rest in peace Nani. I will always and always love and cherish and remember you.

December 2006, Delhi. Nani is knitting socks for me

July 2010. A cousin’s wedding in Banaras. The photo is taken in Nani’s house.

My darling Anna

I wanted to do a post when Anna turned two and a half – that was 3 months ago – sigh. Anyway, I will not go into excuses and reasons and instead just list everything down.

1) Anna is a chatterbox. I know I keep saying it but the one most striking thing about her is the amount she talks and the way she talks. She’s in a really hilarious phase right now and keeps us entertained with the gems she comes up with. She has actually learnt how to count and is mostly accurate in counting upto 5 of anything. What surprises me even more is that when she’s not in the mood she deliberately gives the wrong answer or answers with something totally unrelated. She’s learning English – her preschool teachers say she understands everything even though she always answers back in Hindi. Her accent leaves a lot to be desired for, she spends the day with the maid and so talks like her – Mommy guilt in full force here too. She tells stories and sings songs and is a big drama queen. She uses her lower lip to full effect and the full on drama is making R dread the years to come. She has also started lying and I have no clue how to handle that. It’s always harmless and I know it’s normal so I let it be, though I usually try to make it clear to her that I know she’s lying. Mostly it’s just to get attention – stuff like everyone in school got breakfast but I didn’t get any. The first time I actually called the school to ask but now I’ve got wiser. But the problem is I can’t fully trust what she says. So when I ask her everyday about how her day was and how Aunty treated her, I know she’s lying when she tells me that Aunty didn’t give her anything to eat, but then again I don’t want to miss something which is actually wrong just thinking that she’s lying.

2) Potty training is fully done – fingers crossed. She’d been off day time diapers for a long time and around a month ago we finally removed the night time ones as well. No accidents so far and I think we’re over that stage. She in any case doesn’t pee in the middle of the night so the pain of having to get up and take her to the toilet is not there.

3) The ‘I will do everything myself’ stage is in full swing. We’re trying to let her do stuff herself but sometimes when it’s just not possible she might have a major meltdown. Another not so nice phase is the ‘everything is mine’ phase. She specially has a lot of competition with my cousin’s daughter who is almost a year old and tries to grab her toys and whatever she’s playing with. The problem is that all the other kids are less than a year old and still in the baby stage. She is the only toddler around and so is the one who always gets scolded for being naughty. I’m trying to find a balance between being too strict and letting her get away with bad behaviour. But I think because of my horror for badly behaved children I lean too much on the other side. She’s after all not yet three and sometimes I feel really bad for having scolded her. So that’s my biggest challenge currently – defusing the bad behaviour without being too harsh and also without spoiling her.

3) School admission is done and I’m so relieved. Not that we were too worried or taking too much effort – but it is a load off our heads. Our biggest priority was distance – not more than 5kms from home. That narrowed the number of prospective schools down to 3. The first one she got into very easily – one of the teachers took her in to see some toys and luckily she happily went with her. Came out after 10 minutes and they said we can pay the fees. The school was good but not exactly what I had in mind – it looked more like a corporate office and I am pretty old fashioned when it comes to education. So we decided to wait for at least the result of one more school before paying – it was 30k non-refundable. The other school is a junior school till KG which then feeds into a main branch. They called us for ‘interaction’ – I thought they would mostly talk to us and maybe ask Anna a few questions. We met the principal who didn’t ask us a single thing, all the questions were directed to Anna. What’s your name, sing a rhyme, identify animals, shapes, colours. She answered ALL the questions and we were so proud of her. I did feel bad that she gave her first ‘interview’ at the tender age of two and a half, that the rat race starts so young. But what choice do we have? Anyway we were just glad that she did well and I think the principal thought so too because she got a seat. I’m quite happy with the school – the original main branch is 50 years old and I admit to having a slightly snobbish attitude towards ‘new’ schools. Hopefully she’ll like it there and enjoy going to school as much as her Mumma did.

4) Work is as crazy as usual. I’ve gotten sick of hearing myself crib so I’ve just stopped. I slog hard on weekdays and keep my weekends free – though it is expected that we work on weekends too but phrrrrr. I won’t make my baby pay more for the cost of my career – she’s paying enough as it is.

5) Anna has become such a lovely little girl that I can’t stop myself from wondering over the perfection I see in her . Sometimes I look at those big sparkling eyes, the lovely round cheeks touched with just the right hint of pink, the rosebud mouth with the glistening pink lips, the arms and legs which are so much longer now with just traces of baby fat – and I feel my heart stop – I feel that I will just burst from the pride and joy and love I feel for her. I feel amazed that something so beautiful and innocent exists in this world. It’s not just the physical perfection I see in her, it’s her sharp mind, her developing sense of humour, her sweetness when she kisses me and snuggles with me, her energy and enthusiasm for everything and even her screaming and her tantrums.

That’s it. There is one more thing I’m dying to write about but it deserves a separate post to itself which I will hopefully get around to soon.

Why I feel that my heart is breaking.

There’s a lot going on in my head. I need to let it out or I’ll explode.

Life is crazy busy right now. Get up at 6-6:30. Give Anna her milk, make tea for R and I, drink tea, straighten the bed, straighten the house, supervise the maid, have a bath, play with Anna while R bathes and dresses and has breakfast and leaves (around 7:50), bathe Anna, get dressed while she is splashing in the bathroom, get her dressed, have breakfast, try to give Anna her breakfast and mostly give up and leave it to her babysitter, leave at 8:30 once baby-sitter has arrived (sometimes Anna cries, sometimes she doesn’t), reach office, work, work, work, leave around 5:30, reach home by 5:45, baby-sitter leaves by 6, play with Anna, give Anna her dinner, brush teeth, change clothes, R is back (around 7:15), he plays with Anna for sometime, take Anna to bed (around 7:45), lie in the dark for anything between 15 minutes to 45 minutes, have dinner and then work, work, work, sleep by 11 – 11:30. Rinse repeat.

To add to this I often have to attend calls in the evenings. I don’t mind the post 9pm ones since Anna is in bed, but I have at least one call a week in the evening at 6:30. I hate those calls. I hate plugging in my earphones and half listening to the call and half playing with Anna. I hate anything encroaching on my time with Anna. I hate this whole corporate structure in India but that is fodder for another post.

It’s good to be busy but there are parts of it that really bother me. 1) I don’t spend enough time with Anna. Now truly speaking, the amount of work I have in office doesn’t affect my time with Anna since I finish my work after she’s slept. But I do feel it affects the quality of that time since I’m so much more tired and stressed out. This feeling is intensified when she’s sniffling in the morning that she doesn’t want to go to school, that she doesn’t want ‘Basanti Aunty’, that Mumma should not go to office. 2) I get no time for myself. Even writing this blog post is using time in which I should be working. I have not read a book in weeks. I have not gone to the parlour for weeks.

I know I don’t want to quit my job. I have been recently promoted, the money is very good, the work is good, I know I can’t be happy at home all the time. I just wish I was better at maintaining the balance between not working at all and working like a donkey. I always feel that since I take a full person’s salary I should not hold my child as an excuse to work less – even though I work more than the bachelors in my team.

To make matters worse I am traveling to US for one week on Saturday. I will be back next Monday. When the trip came up I initially dismissed it. Then after a lot of counseling from my manager (who is also a woman and has 2 kids) I started considering it, talked to R about it. It’s a great opportunity work-wise, I will get to meet senior people in the team and it’s only one week. That’s how I convinced myself. R’s mother is coming here tomorrow to help out when I’m not here. On one level I know it’ll mostly be okay. R will be here, her baby-sitter will be here and Anna is very fond of her, R’s mother will be here. Anna was perfectly fine for the one day I had gone to Chennai for the visa interview – that was the first time I left her overnight.

Still I feel like crying every time I think of going. My little baby, how will I ever survive one week without her? How will she rationalize the fact that Mumma is not here, will she think I’ve left her, will she cry for me? What if she ignores me once I’m back?

I’m torn. Not just for the trip but for this whole working mother thing in general. Will I regret when I’m dying not having spent more time with Anna, will I regret having wasted my precious hours and days and years on ‘work’ – something which will have no meaning when I’m old? On the flip side – will I be happy at home full-time, will I get bored and resent R and Anna, what about once Anna is older and has her own life, my field of work has no free-lancing and it’s difficult to get back once you’re out, what about money, what will it mean to us to have our income cut by half, what it will mean to me to not bring in money? There are so many questions and I have no answers. And so we go 0n, changing nothing, hoping and praying that everything will be alright, that there will be no bitter regrets later.

Being the mother of a shy child.

Anna is a shy child. Shy and timid. It bothers me – I hate to admit it and I know it’s wrong, but it does bother me.

She has always been a bit clingy. There are always a few incidents a day in which she even rejects R. Mumma chahiye and that’s it. I don’t like it. It puts a lot of strain on me and I’m also concerned about her clinginess. One of the first things she says in the morning is ‘Aaj chutti hai – school/office nahi jaana’. Every single day. I know she likes going there but she is not one of those kids who run into school without a backward glance. One of the other things she says is ‘Basanti Aunty nahi aayegi aaj. Anu ko Basanti Aunty ke paas nahi jaana’. Basanti Aunty is her baby-sitter. She’s been with us for a month now since my old baby-sitter left. It’s not that she hasn’t adjusted to her – she has and I am very thankful for that. She used to say the same for her old baby-sitter. She just wants me to be with her all the time. She used to howl really loudly when I left in the morning but now for the past few days she just whimpers a bit – she’s understood that Mumma has to leave and will be back by evening. I know it’s normal for her age to be upset – but still I feel so bad everyday.

Even in the park – she is not one of the kids running around recklessly. She is very scared of older kids and immediately starts crying and clings to me if they are around and being boisterous. She never snatches anyone else’s toys and I’m really thankful for that – but she doesn’t even try and stop other babies from taking her stuff. Some of the kids will come over and immediately start taking her toys – Anna gets scared and won’t even try to take her things back. She just backs off and comes to me – as if the toys aren’t even hers. I’m all for sharing but I don’t want her to be a doormat. I hate watching other kids playing with her toys while she just looks on – unable to go and take what is hers. I’m torn between intervening on her behalf and letting her learn to stand up for herself. She’s even scared of kids younger than her. If she’s waiting her turn to get on the slide, she will keep waiting as other kids push past her unless I get in and help her. If she’s already climbing and a bigger kid starts climbing behind her, she gets scared and starts crying. One day a relative and their daughter, who is a few months younger than Anna, had come to visit. The little girl pushed Anna many times, tried her best to hit her, grabbed her toys and Anna didn’t fight back. She very sweetly offered more toys and was really happy to have someone to play with.

Anna is actually quite assertive at home and in places where she’s very comfortable. It’s just out and about in public that these situations turn up. In any case at home she rules the roost – no competition to speak of.

The problem is that kids like her are in the minority. Most kids I see have no problem grabbing what they want or pushing ahead to take their turn. I don’t even blame them because it seems natural at their age. I’m only worried that my gentle girl get’s left behind. Deep down I know that I should be proud of her gentle nature – and I am. I’m proud that she never grabs stuff, never hits, that I don’t have to keep running after her when we’re out to keep her out of mischief, that people we visit never have to immediately start baby-proofing their house. However, the world we live in is not a gentle place. I can protect her now most of the time, but if she doesn’t learn to be assertive I don’t know how she’ll survive a few years down the line. I don’t want my daughter to get lost in a crowd, to be the one in her group of friends who is always following. I know that I might be worrying needlessly, that she is still only a baby, that I should not be wishing for her nature to be different from what it is, that she may always be shy and there is nothing I may be able to do about it. I know that though the world doesn’t seem to value quiet people, sometimes they are the ones who really shine.

My problem is that I am confused. Confused about whether this a problem at all or should I just ignore it, confused about whether I should even try to make her be less timid or accept it as her nature, confused about whether I should intervene on her behalf or let her suffer and maybe learn to be stronger because of it, confused about whether it is just a matter of time and things will be okay or that I have to help her in some way.

Sigh. What do I do?

Facebook II

6.9.2012
Today morning while leaving for office. Anna for once is not howling.
Me: Bye Anna. Good girl, don’t cry.
Anna (in a very sad voice): Mumma shaam ko jaldi aayegi. Rona mat. Rone ka koi fayda nahi.
Words of wisdom. My baby is growing up.

22.8.2012
R: Anna, Rajesh Khanna kaise bolta tha?
Anna: Rajesh Ganna?
R: Haan, Rajesh Ganna kaise bolta tha?
Anna (tilting her head to one side): Pushpaaa, I hate tears!
Cuteness overload

6.8.2012
A few nights ago – Anna was coughing in her sleep. I applied Vicks on her chest and back. Without opening her eyes she kept muttering “Don’t touch, don’t touch”.
I hope she remembers this when she is a teenager.

23.7.2012
Me : Shit! It’s raining! (while running with Anna in my arms)
Anna: Shit, shit, shit. Hee hee hee.
Now what do I do?

13.7.2012
Three little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell down and bumped her head.
Mamma called the the Doctor and the Doctor said
NO MORE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED!
I can’t get this song out my head. Heeeeeelp!

15.6.2012
Anna: Yeh Anu ki Mumma hai.
R: Nahi. Yeh Papa ki wife hai.
Anna: Nahi. Yeh Anu ki Mumma hai.
Me: :):)

28.5.2012
@12 o clock last night – Anna mumbles in her sleep
“Ringa ringa roses”
Now we know what babies dream of.

24.5.2012
The Terrible Twos are here!
Anna chalo nahane. Nahiiii and runs away.
Anna nahana ho gaya, tub se niklo. Nahiiii and wriggles like a slimy eel, making it impossible for me to take her out.
Anna aao kanghi karao – park jaana hai. Nahiiii and runs away.
Anna chalo ghar chalein – khelna ho gaya. Nahiii and runs away.
Then when she’s asleep at night – I look at her and wonder where this sweet angel was all day.
Interesting times. I refuse to let someone who is less than 3 feet tall get the better of me. Who am I kidding?

16.5.2012
The first six weeks were tougher than I ever imagined. The first six months went by slowly. At the end of the first year, I was just happy to have survived.
Now another year has gone by. I just want time to slow down, to give me more time with my baby, let me enjoy the baby hugs and kisses and cuddles, the baby voice with the most adorable lisp.
Happy 2nd Birthday Anna!

19.4.2012
Today morning while leaving for office.
Me: Anna acche se school jana. Rona nahi (she’s started a new pre-school).
R: Bye Anna
Anna: Papa acche se office jana. Rona nahi.
Now we know who hates to go to office!

19.4.2012
The Terrible Twos are fast approaching. I am so not ready for this. Why do babies grow?

Anna dressed as Sarojini Naidu for a fancy dress function on 15th August in her school.

One more?

I have done an almost complete flip since my post last year. Last year, I was almost sure that I did not have it in me to have another baby. Now, baby fever has struck big time! It could have something to do with the fact that we are surrounded by babies – my cousin S had a baby girl in March, my brother had another baby girl in July and my cousin R is due with TWINS in November. To add to that my baby-sitter is also pregnant. Even then, there is more to it. I now really, really, really want another baby.

I don’t know exactly when I changed. When I went from no more to I want another baby right now. I dream about having another for a substantial amount of time everyday. R always wanted another one so I guess there’s nothing stopping us . Though I would like nothing more than to start immediately, we will have to wait for a few months. No big reason but just many small ones adding up – R is starting a new job on Monday and his new office is further away. That means more time on the road and less time at home. My mom is busy with my brother’s baby and I want to give her some breathing space. My baby-sitter is pregnant and will be leaving in October. Anna is extremely attached to her and we will have a tough time finding a suitable replacement. I know these are not big reasons but I don’t want to add to the confusion. Plus this time I really want to plan it well. Anna was not a planned baby and we want to have at least the false illusion of control this time around.

My target (as if I am talking about some business proposal) is sometime next year. I just can’t wait! I know it will be tough, I know that our lives which have slowly come back on track after the months of newborn/baby chaos will dive back into even greater chaos, I know that Anna might have a tough time adjusting (she is very possessive about me), I sometimes feel a bit wistful that I will not be able to baby her as much as I do know,  I know that after working so hard in the past few months to get back on track at office, my work will now suffer again. But I just don’t care. I know that the joys and rewards will be far-far greater than any troubles, I know that Anna will be a great big sister, I know that she will have a sibling to love and cherish for the rest of her life, I know that my NEED for a baby is far stronger than anything else.

I am also hoping that this time around it will not be so difficult. We are no longer a young, free couple who will miss their freedom and comforts. I also hope that I will be much smarter in some ways and not make the same mistakes again.

All this is of course still in my head. I am not pregnant and most probably will not be for a few months more. But just thinking about all this makes me so happy.

Anna’s school celebrated Janmashtmi yesterday. Here is a photo of the little Radha.

Potty Training Update

Finally some success! After months of remaining at a standstill, Anna is now almost fully potty trained, and it only took two weeks. Yaayyy  to her and a big sigh of relief for me. Touchwood and anti-jinx.

We started the day after her birthday. Mummy is here and with Anna the whole day and that did the trick. We just removed her diapers for the entire duration of her waking hours. The pee training was first and there were almost no accidents at all. In the beginning she would say she had to go far more frequently than she actually had to. She would pee maybe only 1 time out of 4. But now she’s mostly accurate. We always clap and cheer for her when she goes in the potty and she gets to watch a few videos on the iPad.

Poo training was a bit difficult. She would hold it in and not go at all the whole day. We finally left her in her diaper in the mornings when she woke up, and she would go in that. Finally, two days ago she pooed in her potty and has being doing so since then.

Now the problem is that when we go out, she doesn’t want to pee in her diaper and gets upset. We still have to figure this one out. I am not comfortable taking her to public toilets (mostly not very clean) yet and in any case she’s not able to balance on the adult potty and needs the extra seat. I don’t see us carrying it around everywhere and am not able to think of an alternative.

Next on the agenda will be going to play school without diapers once it opens in June and then nap time and night time training.

This is such a big milestone and it turned out to be so much easier than I expected. Mumma is so proud of you, baby. You’re becoming such a big girl. It’s bittersweet each time you achieve a milestone. Most of me is happy and proud but a small part of me wants to hold on to your babyness for a little longer. You’re a big kid now!

I’m late, I’m late, I’m late.

Anna turned TWO years old on Tuesday, and I am a full 3 days late in posting about it.

Happy Birthday Baby! May you always be healthy, wealthy and wise. May you live long and live happy.

This is what I posted on Facebook the day after her birthday  –                                             The first six weeks were tougher than I ever imagined. The first six months went by slowly. At the end of the first year, I was just happy to have survived.
Now another year has gone by. I just want time to slow down, to give me more time with my baby, let me enjoy the baby hugs and kisses and cuddles, the baby voice with the most adorable lisp.
Happy 2nd Birthday Anna!

The party was great. I was vacillating between just having a normal lunch out with family like we do for our birthdays or having a party at home for her ‘friends’. I kept thinking she’s too small to really enjoy a party with friends and plus the effort was scaring me off. What tilted the decision was the fact that Mummy was arriving a couple of days before her birthday. With mom here I can handle any party! Anyway we decided to have the party at home and she really did enjoy herself. The kids were all well-behaved and I think they all had fun.

I baked a cake and took it to her summer camp in the morning, she received multiple gifts throughout the day, the party was good, the food was tasty, there were loads of balloons, the cake we ordered was great, what else can anyone ask for? We got her a toy kitchen and Mummy got her a tiny doll house. The other gifts were also great – she got soft toys, puzzles, play doh, a train set, tea sets, clothes. We spent the next 2 days sorting out through her stuff and now have 2 big bags of toys and one bag of clothes to donate.

What touched me the most was that both my maids got gifts for her. It was totally unexpected and I felt a bit guilty accepting gifts from them, but it also made me so happy. That the people who look after my daughter care for her so much. When her ‘Didi’ was leaving after the party, Anna clung to her and cried and didn’t want her to go even though I was there. I think I can stop worrying about whether Anna is happy or not with the maid and whether she looks after her or not. Anna’s clinging to her is testimonial enough for me.

Playing with her doll house.

Friends.

Ready to party. The baby in the background is my cousin S’s baby. It was her 10th week birthday too.

Tweety pie!

Long time…

no see. I kept feeling guilty about letting the days pass without writing about Anna here but was not able to shake off the lethargy. Plus nothing much has been happening. Anna says and does a lot of new things but we have now become so used to her talking like a five year old that we take it for granted. Plus work has been a bit hectic and that’s my biggest excuse.

Anyway there is no way I can remember and write down all that has been happening so will just jot down the things I can recollect now. Anna is talking up a storm. She talks in full sentences with mostly correct grammar. She mostly talks/understands Hindi but I have a suspicion that she knows a bit of English too. In any case most of the nursery rhymes she recites are in English. She is slowly learning to actually recognize the alphabets and not just recite them like any other song. She has a board game in which all the alphabets fit into slots which have a corresponding picture painted on them. Yesterday she was playing with it with R and we both got a shock when she picked up the G and said ‘Yeh grapes mein jayega’. She did the same with a few more as well.

Anna has been super-excited about her upcoming birthday for some time now. She keeps saying ‘Anna ka birthday aa raha hai’. One day she also said that ‘Anna ko gift milega’. I really don’t know where she picked up that concept from. We’d gone on a vacation to both our places a few days ago. My mom told Anna that she would buy her a toy laptop for her birthday. A few hours later I told her to come and put on her sandals since we were going shopping. She immediately said ‘Anna ka laptop lene ja rahe hain’. We had to somehow convince her that she would get the laptop only on her birthday. Now another line has been added to her birthday chant – ‘Anna ko laptop milega’.

We were buying some clothes for her and I wanted her to try on a skirt before buying it. She tells me ‘Pehle billing kara lo’. Another day she was randomly counting something on her fingers. She is usually very random with counting, she knows the numbers till almost 20 but that’s it. But that day when she reached 6 she switched to the other hand!

We have put her in a new play school. I was very happy with her old one and Anna was also very happy going there but they closed their toddler program and now only have a full day daycare. She started day before yesterday and howled like anything. Yesterday was thankfully better and she didn’t cry so much. In the morning while leaving for office, I told her ‘Acche so school jaana. Rona nahi’. R was also leaving at the same time and said bye to her. To which she said ‘Papa acche se office jaana. Rona nahi’. There are multiple incidents like these each day. Talking to her is so much fun. We never know what she will say and are constantly amazed by the things she knows. I am one proud mommy and this is one place I am not scared to show it. I truly think she talks and thinks and understands a lot more than is average for her age.

Health wise things are okay. She’d been coughing a lot before we went for our vacation. Now she’s much better. All doctor’s we’ve consulted have said it’s most probably allergic and will go away in a few years. There’s nothing we can do. Added to the cough, Anna has started to suffer from motion sickness as well. So sometimes it seems as if we are living in a sea of puke. She often pukes in the car and again doctors say that it should go away in a few years and there is nothing we can do.

Potty training is still not progressing. It’s mostly our fault for not being consistent enough. Mummy is planning to come over for a few weeks for Anna’s birthday next month and I plan to totally focus and use that time.

Will upload a few pics of the vacation once we get around to transferring them from the camera.

ETA: I just realised that I completed one year of blogging in March! I don’t even have a single post in March this year. Well, never mind. Happy Birthday Blog! You have been so good to me .